you're a much
better
(writer) artist
than you are
a(n)
(artist) writer
a compliment?
diminishing
one worth
to validate
another?
you're not
competition
i think nothing
of your "work"
i think
even less
of you
but thank you
© 2011 by Micael Chadwick
All Rights Reserved
Trash
Feels like
it’s been
forever
since I hung
on your
every word
now
you can’t be heard
(at all)
hurt healed
and your Ghost
all but forgotten
floating amongst
discarded disregarded
eggshells
and yesterday’s
roses
© 2011 by M Chadwick
All Rights Reserved
it’s been
forever
since I hung
on your
every word
now
you can’t be heard
(at all)
hurt healed
and your Ghost
all but forgotten
floating amongst
discarded disregarded
eggshells
and yesterday’s
roses
© 2011 by M Chadwick
All Rights Reserved
Federico
I wonder how
many Buñuels
we entertain
never knowing
smelling the fires
and tasting the blood
but in our
erection of ego
never
realising
the Paris burning
is our own
and the
Butterfly whisperer
lays dying
© 2011 by M Chadwick
All Rights Reserved
many Buñuels
we entertain
never knowing
smelling the fires
and tasting the blood
but in our
erection of ego
never
realising
the Paris burning
is our own
and the
Butterfly whisperer
lays dying
© 2011 by M Chadwick
All Rights Reserved
Review
your prompt
stop jingles
maul my muse
gang banging on
grainy 8mm
in a snuff film
with a soundtrack
of pretension
i miss the days
of anonymity
in mental patient white
when my words
rambled to
no one echoing
in an empty room
filled to the brim
i long to be
that fameless whore
dancing with
devils in darkness
and no one else
the wiser
weighing in
and setting my scales
off balance
stop jingles
maul my muse
gang banging on
grainy 8mm
in a snuff film
with a soundtrack
of pretension
i miss the days
of anonymity
in mental patient white
when my words
rambled to
no one echoing
in an empty room
filled to the brim
i long to be
that fameless whore
dancing with
devils in darkness
and no one else
the wiser
weighing in
and setting my scales
off balance
Tattling
my wallet
holds no monies
only stamps for
letters unwritten
a calling card
for antiquities
in a tiny
Texas town
a painting in
miniature
Taking Flight
to remind me
to soar
and tattered bits
of faded poems
in death
it tells
my story well
© 2011, Micael Chadwick
All Rights Reserved
holds no monies
only stamps for
letters unwritten
a calling card
for antiquities
in a tiny
Texas town
a painting in
miniature
Taking Flight
to remind me
to soar
and tattered bits
of faded poems
in death
it tells
my story well
© 2011, Micael Chadwick
All Rights Reserved
I decline
today i went wondering
and found
i had locked myself out
rusted chains barring
entrance
leaving me stranded
in supposed to bes
keyless and naked
survivor
warrior
supporter
when i want
nothing more
than to kick
in your teeth
sling hot glue and glitter
in rabid paint swaths
of fuck you
in the faces of your
warm fuzzy horseshit
and pat on the back
good job
rabbits
and found
i had locked myself out
rusted chains barring
entrance
leaving me stranded
in supposed to bes
keyless and naked
survivor
warrior
supporter
when i want
nothing more
than to kick
in your teeth
sling hot glue and glitter
in rabid paint swaths
of fuck you
in the faces of your
warm fuzzy horseshit
and pat on the back
good job
rabbits
Snow hidden murder
[Magpie Tales #44]
The snow falls
freezing you to
my heart
I become numb
at long last
The cold you
have mastered
enraptures me
with it's icy grasp
There you lay
in a bed of white
still, quiet, naked
preserved dead
And I
just slide away
as the snow falls
The snow falls
freezing you to
my heart
I become numb
at long last
The cold you
have mastered
enraptures me
with it's icy grasp
There you lay
in a bed of white
still, quiet, naked
preserved dead
And I
just slide away
as the snow falls
Memoriam (dust to dust)
[rough draft]
you'd become forgotten
nothing more
than spiral bound yesterdays
withered in weathered cardboard
i loved you once
dismissed inappropriate
and greyhounded
thousands of miles
and lifetimes away
like cancer you return
marring the make-believe
i believed you to be
attacking the celluloid seams
that held you high
a marble fauned beauty
faded to grey
on a pedestal crumbled to dust
in the glory of
the page burning flames
your reality never nears
the better off dead
of my memoriam
you'd become forgotten
nothing more
than spiral bound yesterdays
withered in weathered cardboard
i loved you once
dismissed inappropriate
and greyhounded
thousands of miles
and lifetimes away
like cancer you return
marring the make-believe
i believed you to be
attacking the celluloid seams
that held you high
a marble fauned beauty
faded to grey
on a pedestal crumbled to dust
in the glory of
the page burning flames
your reality never nears
the better off dead
of my memoriam
Smash
I want to smash
your face in
for all your
false airs
pretention
and oh woe is me
destroy the vanity
on which you live
amid perfumed finery
and all the right labels
expose you
to the glare of day
outside your cavern
and your soft
white lights
break backs
and hide your remains
for the garbage man
i want to smash
in
your face
send shards flying
in a spatter painted Pollock
of smirk and blood
(but it's a fucking expensive mirror)
your face in
for all your
false airs
pretention
and oh woe is me
destroy the vanity
on which you live
amid perfumed finery
and all the right labels
expose you
to the glare of day
outside your cavern
and your soft
white lights
break backs
and hide your remains
for the garbage man
i want to smash
in
your face
send shards flying
in a spatter painted Pollock
of smirk and blood
(but it's a fucking expensive mirror)
Growing out of the River
she throws the pieces
of her heart
into the river
ribbons of gore
trailing red
in the current
the sorrow seeps
through her boots
on the bank
blank
filling up the empty spaces
places his inadequacies
once lived
she overflows
falling tears
failing laughter
memories of
never weres
and will be never nows
in the mud she waits
for the rising sun
the seeds planted
to take root
to grow
to bloom
to become the shadow caster
instead of the darkness
in which he hid
of her heart
into the river
ribbons of gore
trailing red
in the current
the sorrow seeps
through her boots
on the bank
blank
filling up the empty spaces
places his inadequacies
once lived
she overflows
falling tears
failing laughter
memories of
never weres
and will be never nows
in the mud she waits
for the rising sun
the seeds planted
to take root
to grow
to bloom
to become the shadow caster
instead of the darkness
in which he hid
Outside In
[This was inspired by World AIDS Day 2010 and the current Magpie Tales weekly photo prompt (#43).]
the door slammed
echoing a harsh reality
into the bitter cold
i stood
positively frozen
death sentence
in hand
locked out
of my own life
i turned
to find you
in the darkening snow
an army of lovers
rewording fate
wielding pen and paper
as sword and shield
dismissing the door
and kicking in windows
you bonfired the baggage
and began to reteach me to tango
and dance in the flames
the door slammed
echoing a harsh reality
into the bitter cold
i stood
positively frozen
death sentence
in hand
locked out
of my own life
i turned
to find you
in the darkening snow
an army of lovers
rewording fate
wielding pen and paper
as sword and shield
dismissing the door
and kicking in windows
you bonfired the baggage
and began to reteach me to tango
and dance in the flames
That Fucking Trophy
[I'm struggling with this one... It wants to be written but I sure as fuck can't hear the damned thing... This was from last weeks Mag. Totally stumped me.]
take your trashcan trophy
and leave me be
remove me from
the pedestal
on which I never belonged
it was your fantasy
of who I was not
rather than any
Tony winning
performance of mine
what you see
is what you got
with your eyes closed
dust off the gilding
turn to turpentine
peel skins away
reveal the charred interior
and revel in the discrepancy
of what you wanted
against the reality
of me
take your trashcan trophy
and leave me be
remove me from
the pedestal
on which I never belonged
it was your fantasy
of who I was not
rather than any
Tony winning
performance of mine
what you see
is what you got
with your eyes closed
dust off the gilding
turn to turpentine
peel skins away
reveal the charred interior
and revel in the discrepancy
of what you wanted
against the reality
of me
in need of toilet paper
i watch the gore
fall from her face
and i think of you
your ideals
your rambling
fumbling
idiocity
plopping vomit
to puddle
in chunky piles
around your
knock off Docs
i wonder how high
i must have been
to stoop so low
and stumble
to fall for you
and believe
your Prince Charming
horseshit
when outhouse
spectacular
is your top billing
at best
fall from her face
and i think of you
your ideals
your rambling
fumbling
idiocity
plopping vomit
to puddle
in chunky piles
around your
knock off Docs
i wonder how high
i must have been
to stoop so low
and stumble
to fall for you
and believe
your Prince Charming
horseshit
when outhouse
spectacular
is your top billing
at best
battle (cries)
the warrior's sword
feels foreign in hand
hiding shielded for so long
his stance uncertain
but determined
weary of wanting more
when the taking
was his
all along
loaded for bear
tentative steps
lead him to intented
salvation
feels foreign in hand
hiding shielded for so long
his stance uncertain
but determined
weary of wanting more
when the taking
was his
all along
loaded for bear
tentative steps
lead him to intented
salvation
broken bones
wish bones healing
broken years melding together
in a horror film fusion
of hard knocks
and lessons learned
feathers forming
from a carrion's corpse
to rise from the ruined
for first time flight
a decade of dues
crawling through glass
the gutter glamour
giving way
off bloodied knee
to the promise
of a so called life
broken years melding together
in a horror film fusion
of hard knocks
and lessons learned
feathers forming
from a carrion's corpse
to rise from the ruined
for first time flight
a decade of dues
crawling through glass
the gutter glamour
giving way
off bloodied knee
to the promise
of a so called life
as of yet
In my tree with Natalie
spying on bags packed
and promises broken
I climb a ladder
of stolen pens
and paper scrapped
for inspiration
scrubbing free the
yesterdays
i revel in you
as eraser dust
blown away
nothing more now
than shadowed smudges
on weathered parchment
spying on bags packed
and promises broken
I climb a ladder
of stolen pens
and paper scrapped
for inspiration
scrubbing free the
yesterdays
i revel in you
as eraser dust
blown away
nothing more now
than shadowed smudges
on weathered parchment
Living in Meaning
the Belle tolls
but not in sorrow
as she swims
her oceans
to distant shores
walking rebirthed
and gloried
amongst Tigers
celebrating the journeys
of all that has come before
but not in sorrow
as she swims
her oceans
to distant shores
walking rebirthed
and gloried
amongst Tigers
celebrating the journeys
of all that has come before
I find your offense offensive.
you scolded me for
darkening your circle
dancing shadows
into your flash light fallacies
assaulted like a rape victim on
new year's eve
left to heave and bleed
in the snow
when i realized
the blood on my hands
and between my thighs
was my own
so with it
i decorate my own
pretention
smearing crimson arcs
of gore
across the landscape
of the fake world
i have created
to hide from the hurt
of the real one
changing my name
and embracing
the demons within
darkening your circle
dancing shadows
into your flash light fallacies
assaulted like a rape victim on
new year's eve
left to heave and bleed
in the snow
when i realized
the blood on my hands
and between my thighs
was my own
so with it
i decorate my own
pretention
smearing crimson arcs
of gore
across the landscape
of the fake world
i have created
to hide from the hurt
of the real one
changing my name
and embracing
the demons within
Soldiered
breath held
for a year
waiting word
scouring news
longing to hear
anything
whispers of your safety
mentions of your name
your surprise return
caught me unguarded
whirlwind spin
of relief
euphoric elation
hands tremble
in anticipation
of seeing your face
once again
your existence
still unreal
a figment
dream come true
until I touch you
once again
home soiled
beyond enemy lines
for a year
waiting word
scouring news
longing to hear
anything
whispers of your safety
mentions of your name
your surprise return
caught me unguarded
whirlwind spin
of relief
euphoric elation
hands tremble
in anticipation
of seeing your face
once again
your existence
still unreal
a figment
dream come true
until I touch you
once again
home soiled
beyond enemy lines
take it
i give no shit
i have no shit to give
if i am not yours
by your fucked sideways standards
your father mother
your lover hater
your child neglected
fucked up parent
i am not yours
ever
nor ever will i be
i am mine
woman phenomenonally
man cub
child of the wolves
birth of a chicken
set to devour
your bullshit
your hatred
your false pretense
you no longer exist
i am me
i am mine
i will rise
and you
the pyre of the phoenix
will burn to cinder
ash and rubble
you will expire
never to fly again
with your manipulations
war crimes and tactics
you
my loves and hates
will vanish like
the weapons of
mass destruction
you weilded against
my broken hearth
only to watch yourself
ass in the air
like the power bottom bitch
that you really are
slapped down like the whore
that you love
with your double ended dildo
of life
i have no shit to give
if i am not yours
by your fucked sideways standards
your father mother
your lover hater
your child neglected
fucked up parent
i am not yours
ever
nor ever will i be
i am mine
woman phenomenonally
man cub
child of the wolves
birth of a chicken
set to devour
your bullshit
your hatred
your false pretense
you no longer exist
i am me
i am mine
i will rise
and you
the pyre of the phoenix
will burn to cinder
ash and rubble
you will expire
never to fly again
with your manipulations
war crimes and tactics
you
my loves and hates
will vanish like
the weapons of
mass destruction
you weilded against
my broken hearth
only to watch yourself
ass in the air
like the power bottom bitch
that you really are
slapped down like the whore
that you love
with your double ended dildo
of life
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